Chapter 211 Closer, much closer
The place I stepped out to was a sort of intermediate corridor, a small passage connecting my rooms. It was more like a room, but served as a corridor. In other words, there were no guards here; all the guards were stationed outside this intermediate corridor. Luciana stood in the corner, right next to the exit door.
When she saw me, a shy expression appeared on her face, and she seemed to lean against the wall as if to keep from falling.
"Mom, is something wrong?" I asked as I approached her.
Luciana seemed hesitant, as if she was making a decision, but it was clear from her expression that this decision was incredibly challenging. I stepped closer and gently stroked her arm.
"Is there a problem? You can tell me,"
Luciana looked at me. Her ocean-blue eyes sparkled under the moonlight. Her silver hair flowed down her back like a river. She held my hand with both of hers and took deep breaths, as if gathering courage.
"I'm so tired of this, Ethan. This wall between us… Why does everything have to be this way?"
Luciana was on the verge of tears, her movements unsteady. I couldn't stop myself from feeling guilty because I was the one who had caused this. Perhaps I shouldn't have confessed my feelings; this was what had brought her to this state.
"How much have you had to drink?" I asked.
Luciana wasn't someone who drank often. In fact, I'd only seen her drink a few times, and even then, it was probably at some important event. At most, she'd have one or two glasses, always telling me she didn't like alcohol. But now, she looked drunk. Her movements were unsteady, and she seemed too weak even to move her body properly.
Luciana lowered her head slightly and muttered while avoiding my gaze, "One… maybe two glasses? But… that doesn't matter. What matters is…" Her words faltered, trembling, as if she couldn't decide what to say. Her face was flushed, though I couldn't tell if it was from embarrassment or the alcohol.
"Mom, you shouldn't push yourself." I held her arm a little more firmly to help her stay balanced. "If there's something you want to say, you can tell me later. Right now, you need to rest."
But Luciana shook her head quickly and swayed slightly. She leaned against the wall for support, then finally turned her eyes back to me. The deep pain and helplessness in her gaze shattered something inside me.
"No, Ethan… I have to say it now. I can't go on like this. To be so close to you yet feel so far away… I can't bear it anymore."
Luciana's voice carried a fragile tone. Her words caught me off guard. My throat tightened because I had always seen this conversation as inevitable, but I had never thought about what I'd do when the time came. My feelings for her were complicated. Luciana was important to me and I wanted things to go this far.
"Luciana…" I said, but before I could finish, she placed her trembling hands on my shoulders.
"I don't know what I am to you, Ethan. But I… I'm more attached to you than I ever thought I could be. And this distance is consuming me." Tears slowly rolled down her cheeks. "If there's no chance for us as mother and son… then… then I'll find another way. I can never lose you... No matter what it takes, I won't lose you."
I was about to respond to Luciana's words when she suddenly stood on her tiptoes and pressed her soft lips against mine. Her unexpected action stunned me. Her intoxication mixed with the courage and desperation brought on the warmth of her lips. At that moment, I felt how vulnerable and passionate she was.
Her lips trembled, her breathing was erratic and uneven. The faint salty taste of her tears mingled with our kiss. The quiet corridor where we stood suddenly felt both warm and tense. Luciana's eyes were closed, and there was a look of surrender on her face, as if she wanted to hold on to this moment forever. But at the same time, she was afraid—I could feel it.
Her warm breath, the softness of her lips, and her fragile state deeply moved and bewildered me. A part of me wanted to respond, while another wished this moment could last forever.
As her hands trembled on my shoulders, mine slowly slid to her waist. When I gently wrapped my arms around her curvy figure, I felt her shiver momentarily. I wasn't sure if it was from fear or the overwhelming emotions she had been suppressing, but I knew she was just as tangled in a web of feelings as I was.
As the kiss deepened, it felt as though all her defenses were crumbling one by one. The bond between our lips was a silent expression of unsaid words, suppressed emotions, and years of longing. As I held her waist more firmly, I realized she was leaning into me. In that moment, I understood that all she wanted was to be with me, to be close, no matter the cost.
She had even set aside her role as a mother just for this. Even if I didn't think I deserved such pure love, the idea of rejecting it never crossed my mind. Because I loved her just as much as she loved me. This woman, with her enormous heart, had unintentionally captivated me.
When Luciana's lips finally parted slightly, she opened her eyes. Her ocean-blue gaze revealed the depth of her emotions. Her look held both love and fear. Her face was still flushed, and tears continued to glisten on her cheeks.
"Ethan…" she whispered, her voice shaky and hoarse. "I shouldn't have done that… but I just couldn't hold it in anymore." She lowered her gaze, taking a small step back as if ashamed of her actions. But my hands were still on her waist, and I didn't let her go.
"Luciana…" I gently touched her chin to lift her head. When our eyes met again, I felt the small distance between us shrink even more. "Don't blame yourself for this. Blame me. Blame me for everything. I'm the one who brought us to this point. These feelings… Don't blame yourself for them."
My words brought a new sparkle to her eyes, as if a burden she had carried for years had suddenly lightened. Yet, I could still see the fear of the magnitude of this moment within her.
"Ethan… you…" she said, but her sentence trailed off again. Slowly, she rested her head on my shoulder and took a deep breath. Her entire being felt intertwined with mine at that moment. Her closeness, coupled with her vulnerability, awakened a deep desire within me to protect her forever.
In just that instant, I understood why Luciana had resisted these feelings for so long. Within her was a mother, a woman, and a person full of complex emotions. But now, those walls were coming down, and she was experiencing both the joy and the weight of it.
"Ethan… I can't blame you… because I've failed as a mother… but I love you. I've been in love with you... for a long time. I'm sorry. I'm a terrible mother... I know that" she whispered.
Luciana's body, leaning against my shoulder, trembled with helplessness. Gently, I wrapped her in my arms and spoke softly, "Luciana… Listen to me. You're a perfect mother, and you'll always remain one of me. But our feelings… These feelings aren't your fault or mine. They're simply a part of being human."
I let Luciana cry silently against my shoulder. She was so fragile and defenseless in my arms that my desire to protect her grew even stronger. Pushing aside my own complex emotions, I focused on comforting her.
After a while, Luciana slowly straightened and turned her gaze back to me. Her face was still flushed, but there was a faint sense of relief in her eyes. She parted her lips, hesitating as if unsure of what to say.
"Will we be happy?"
"Absolutely," I replied.
For the first time in a long while, Luciana smiled at my response. Then, placing her hands on both sides of my face, she said, "Then take me…"
Understanding exactly what she meant, I wrapped my arms around her waist and legs, lifting her up as if she were a princess. I carried her toward the large royal bedroom next door. Luciana rested her head against my chest, but I could feel how fast her heart was beating. It was clear that she was more nervous than I was.
The royal palace's master bedroom was the pinnacle of splendor and elegance. Tall, intricately carved golden pillars supported the ceiling, while delicate crystal chandeliers bathed every corner of the room in soft light. Thick red carpets beneath our feet exuded luxury with every step.
Gold-accented furniture, handcrafted cabinets, and a grand fireplace gave the room an atmosphere befitting royalty. At the center of it all stood a massive four-poster bed, draped with fine, sheer curtains. The bed was adorned with dark blue and gold-patterned satin sheets.
This room once belonged to Richard. A week ago, however, I had asked Luciana to redecorate it, and now everything had been changed according to her tastes. When I reached the bed, Luciana's breathing quickened for a moment. Seeing her so excited yet vulnerable was endearing. I gently lifted her from my arms and laid her onto the soft sheets of the bed.n/ô/vel/b//jn dot c//om
Luciana's long, silver hair spread out across the bed, shining like a river under the moonlight. Her ocean-blue eyes gazed at me with a mix of love, fear, and desire. My lips curved into a slight smile as I found myself unable to look away from her. Luciana's delicate hands reached out, inviting me to join her.
Tonight was the night all barriers between us were broken, and nothing would ever bring back the distance that once existed. Tonight, we were going to be closer than ever before.